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Mall Rats AD 2000

September 27, 2015

What do you see in megapolitan malls these days?

Fashionable families in trendy culottes and pastel-shades bermuda shorts?

Adorable same-sex couples of all ethnics and ages?

Recently settled expats trying to find cold cuts, boxed juices and cheeses?

Those were yesterday.

Nowadays, it’s kids running around bumping into people without saying any excuse, screaming their hearts out as if they have just been released from solitary confinement for a week.

Kids touching and grabbing things they like, from toys to whatever they see in store shelves. When the goods fall down, very calm parents would put things back, saying in a very zen voice, “You can’t do that, Sweetie.”

Kids with strong feet sitting prettily on strollers, simply because they can’t keep up with the coverage area of their parents shopping spree trip.

Nannies shove a pair of shoes to kids, who are big enough to put them on by themselves.

Nannies wear face mask so that their breath are not in direct contact with babies and kids under their care.

Kids repeatedly screaming what they want, dying for their parents’ attention, oblivious to their surrounding.

Angry kids (without any behavioral issues) who are not getting what they want and putting up their best act for the world to see. Often involved stomping their feet the ground or yelling or crying.

Let’s not forget puzzled toddlers dragged into the cinema to see “The Ironnettes of Stark Industries” flashing their booties, Megan Fox’s lock lips with Shia LaBoeuf’s, or a gangster giving a pointblank shot to someone in a car.

Did you do something? Of course not. You’re their doting parents. Let’s find someone else to blame.

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