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You’re an aid worker, when you..

July 26, 2010
tags: , ,
  • Bottom up your drink, from whisky to rice wine,
  • Talk smart in English, preferably with American accent,
  • Smoke because cigarettes are man’s best friend, and the best ice breaker,
  • Be a bar hopper cum pub crawler. Party till dawn,
  • Poverty stays with the people, don’t bring it to the beer table,
  • Believe that flexi-time, business trips to exotic places and duty allowance are the best perks of your work,
  • Know what your donors want, give it, don’t question anything: this is life, not Law and Order or Congressional hearing,
  • Don’t burn any bridges, you’ll bump into the same people at both ends,
  • When you steal, the IRS nor any tax authority won’t get you, so enjoy what you reaped,
  • First, second and third nations correlate with your country of origin,
  • Don’t bother to be smart, you need to be sweet,
  • Visit places, so that you can recommend best local bar and joint to unwind the night,
  • Even Kabul has a golf course, make sure you have a hobby to flaunt,
  • Crowd pleaser is far more favorable,
  • This industry is pretty much like high school: the disaster junkie is the quarterback, the gender queen is the cheerleading captain, the Monitoring & Evaluation person is the valendictorian,
  • Work in places that have just flashed on world news headlines on your TV,
  • After 10-20 years of career, become a master of your own by establishing your own organization,
  • Moonlight as a consultant, take your annual leave to do the work, but never take “leave without pay”, that will set you back,
  • You’re ubercool when you read The Economist and Foreign Affairs, watch BBC but not CNN,
  • Get an SLR camera, big lenses will earn you big respect. Size does matter here,
  • The hotter (conflict) spot you went, the hotter you are,
  • Don’t let David Livingstone, Albert Schweitzer, Mother Theresa inspire you. And Indiana Jones is not even a real person,
  • Spend money wisely, a 6 months contract will only feed you for the next 3 months, unless you call Asia home,
  • 1-3 months post, English only,
  • 6-12 months post: bargain in local language won’t get you any discount and will only make you look ugly when you have to twist your tongue and lips; but it will sure impress that cute guy in cargo pants or cute chick with ethnic bracelets,
  • 12-36 month post: Dude/tte, even babies start to talk properly around this time, so get your ass in a language course and start talking!
  • Heroism and adventures belong to Indiana Jones, so when the office asks you to work from home because of unfriendly-armed-people are seen all over the city, just do it,
  • When the going gets tough, no news, photographs or tell-tale story is worth your deliverables,
  • Know your limits, this is not Navy SEAL training,
  • Challenge and humanity are not always the case. Blame it on the money,
  • Hard post comes with hardship allowance. Caribbean, here I am!
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4 Comments leave one →
  1. March 22, 2011 3:56 PM

    interesting 🙂

  2. M Josephine Wijiastuti permalink
    March 22, 2011 4:03 PM

    Brilliant! Feeling most of the points are damn true 🙂

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